Today as I sit in front of my computer I have mixed feelings. I don't have one specific topic in mind. My mind is filled with all the things that have happened this week. Seven days. Seven sunrises. Seven sunsets. Countless loads of laundry and countless miles on the road. I was reminded this week of the blessings we all receive each and every day. If we have breath in our lungs and blood flowing through our bodies and we feel a pulse, we are blessed. I am not depressed or overwhelmed, but my eyes have been opened this week to the hurting. The hurting that I hurry past each day. The hurting who share what is happening in their lives, but I am only listening with one ear while pondering what I need to do next. The hurting that I can't physically help. The hurting I pray I never experience what they have.
This past week, I have heard about a person who after months of recovery and given a thumbs up to return to work, to only have days later have another accident that requires more surgery and months of recovery lay ahead again. I had several friends who had doctor appointments with specialists this week to try and see why they have certain symptoms and to physically feel better. Some may and some may not be able to find relief, some may have their lives forever changed to a new "normal". I have heard from a friend that someone she knew had suffered a miscarriage. Someone else was having surgery this week. Yet, another was waiting for a room to open up at the hospital so they could have testing done.
The final blow to me that has caused me to reflect so much on this, a friend from softball days was killed in a car accident. I had not seen him in four years. Yet, his death has overwhelmed me this week. He was close to my age. He was traveling a road I travel. I will pass the accident site. My daughter just saw him two days prior. He got up and started his day and hours later he was gone. His daughter will graduate in a few months, with no dad to cheer her on. He won't be there to walk her down the isle. The list could go on and on. I come away with a few thoughts. The hurting will always be among us. One week, it will be our turn. People often ask, "how can a loving God do this?" "Why is this happening to me?"
When going to the hospital to visit someone this week, I realized how full the parking garage was. I am sure each person there was visiting a patient that was having some type physical issue. There is more than one hospital in the town I live in. The wife of the person killed has three children to finish raising by herself. She will have the empty chair at the table to remind her each day, he isn't coming home. His car will no longer be in the garage. She will have many, many, things to adjust to. She didn't have a chance to say good-bye. I think that is the part I am most stuck on. Do I realize that each day, when I say good-bye to someone, it may be the last good-bye or do I always assume we have time? My heart hurts for her. I can't imagine how she feels or even what to say.
Which sometimes is the best thing to say, nothing. To simply listen. To simply agree this stinks that it is happening. To let them sob with tears and simply offer a tissue or embrace, because crying is all we can do. To simply be there for them. They don't need us to fix it as much as they need us to understand it. We want to explain it to them, but we can't. I think we sometimes want to say, "God has this", "It will be okay", "God has plans for you" Really, his plan is to see me hurting? My favorite of all time is "God won't give you more than you can handle". But friend, He will. He will give you more than you can handle, for you see, when it is more than you can handle He shows up and shows us what we can do with Him. We need to remember that with Him all things are possible. So if we include Him and ask His help in ALL things, then the impossible is possible. We need to fully trust and rely and ask his help. Some of the items that I heard this week and listed above, I know how the individual feels. I don't know all of the examples I gave, but when we survive the difficult stuff we walk away changed. We would never sign up for it, nor do we ever want it to happen to us, but if and when it does, we will be able to say something positive came from it. It may take years, but God is able to take a mess or devastation he has allowed and make it better. Each thing that happens to us, is part of the story God is writing for us. We only hear the good things he has planned for us. Then when the stuff that makes us trust him more, or the stuff that makes us grow the most happens, we put our hands over our ears and run. We can become angry and even turn our backs on him. But He has told us from the beginning that things in this world will not be fair. It is a fallen world. Not a perfect world. But praise God, He has not left us to ourselves. He is our constant companion. He has the map and knows the way. He sees the mountains and the valleys before us. And He isn't afraid of heights or depths. He isn't afraid of death. He has overcome them all and is waiting to help us. I firmly believe that when we cry, He cries. How do you explain a miscarriage or death of a spouse/parent a positive thing! You don't. You can't. But when things happen to us, we can't stop loving Him because they have.
The other thing I have been reminded of this week, is to be thankful. I have posted before about thankfulness. I won't repeat myself. But those days when I wake up and get out of bed and start my day, I want to be glad I can. Days that I have piles of laundry I want to be glad I have a family who needs taking care of. Days my husband comes home late from work and I had supper all ready, but now it is getting reheated...I will be grateful he came home alive.
I want to close my blog today with a story that happened several years ago. I was sharing in a bible study with a small group about how it drives me crazy that my husband can't put the newspaper in the trash when he is finished reading it. I explained how I read it during the day and when he comes home, he is the last to read it. I even explained that not only does he not throw it out, but he folds it and lays it on the counter top right above the trash can! I will never forget what happened next. An older woman off to my side, quietly said in a kind voice, I understand what you are saying, but I wish I still had my husband to leave the paper out.....She taught me a valuable lesson that day. We aren't grateful for the health and love ones in our lives. They can be quickly taken away with no warning, as I found out this week. Take time to enjoy life. Take time to enjoy those around you. When you have a rough day or stressful things happen, don't beat yourself up. Bad things happen, they will continue to happen, we can't stop them. How we handle them, now that we can change. Enjoy your loved ones this weekend. Enjoy your situation. Then go out and encourage someone who is having a rough time right now. Give them a hug they are needing. Buy them a cup of coffee and listen to what is weighing on their minds. Drive them to that doctor appointment and be sitting in the waiting room as they await results. Send that email that asks how they are doing or if they need anything. Make that meal they can put in the fridge and heat up later, because the idea of putting a meal together is more than they can comprehend right now. Most importantly, help them to not feel forgotten. When we are healthy we tend to "forget those that aren't". My eyes always fill with tears when I read in scripture that Christ would travel from town to town. The sick would come to him and sometimes he would heal them ALL!!!! Can you even imagine! You know they felt forgotten and unworthy of healing, until His eyes met theirs. Be encouragers this week, I know that there is someone in your circle who needs to feel loved and remembered today! Also, remember, all the items I listed above was just this past week. One week. Seven days, seven sunrises, seven sunsets. ***On a side note, I smile now when I see the newspaper laying on the counter, I don't even mention it anymore.....
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